In my first year of being a carpenters apprentice, I’ve learned that invariably the biggest and bulkiest orders are from people who live or work on the third floor or higher.

This is a universal rule.

A secondary rule seems to be that they don’t have lifts, or the lift is broken, and that there is always a narrow corner on the stairs to squeeze around.

So when we were sent out to make a delivery today, I was pretty pleased to find it was a set of railings for some stairs -nice and light, excellent- and a box for a wheeled rubbish bin, which by definition was in the garden and therefore on ground level.

We arrived to find the customer waiting on the drive. We opened the van and she cooed over her new wooden box. We asked where it should be placed.

“Up there” she said pointing up a steep flight of steps cut into the hillside.

There was even a narrow corner half way up…