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As I mentioned last week, we had the big summer concert at work recently. Like lots of social organisations we occasionally do something like this, even though it means that for a couple of days we have to drop the treehuggy therapy side of our work and just put on a show. As an Arbeitserzieher/Occupational Therapist is essentially there to do the treehuggy therapy thing, this renders me pretty useless but fortunately there is still a need for someone to be a vaguely reliable gopher.

Being generally useless was an advantage as the rain came pounding down at eight in the morning and kept going until early afternoon. I ended up being the designated Holder-up Of The Other Tent Pole so I managed to stay mostly dry, while all the people who knew what they were doing ended up getting soaked doing the complex techy stuff outside.

The rain got bored and went home before the artists turned up, and when the audience arrived I was the Ironic Stage Door Bouncer and spent most of the evening persuading merry people that no, the entrance to the building is that way and there really isn’t anything interesting behind this door, and if they genuinely had an important message for someone I could take it to them et c. The rain held off until just before midnight when the band played its final encore: we have a strict 1200 finish, mainly because one of the largest police stations in Stuttgart is three doors down the road and the boys in blue apparently get really grumpy if their midnight doughnut round is disturbed.

The tidying up part of the operation was simple enough even for an OT: It doesn’t matter where the cables are plugged in, you just tug at it until it comes loose and then dump the whole soggy mess onto our indoor stage to dry out by Monday. We were finished in two hours much to the disappointment of two very well lubricated festival goers who thought they’d finish off the evening listening to a band. After briefly considering turning into rowdily aggressive festival goers they decided that trying to annoy a dozen tired stage shifters was probably a bad idea and wandered off into the night.

Stuttgart’s transport system goes to bed at about eleven, so the organisation laid on taxis for us, which sounds like a quick way to get back, except that our driver was afflicted with the problem of taxi drivers all over the world, of being unable to drive anywhere in a straight line. so I finally arrived in our village at 3am on Sunday after a very informative tour of the surrounding towns…

This week the theatre/social enterprise I work for was part of a big summer festival in our part of the city, which meant Saturday was full of loud music, crowds, lights, more loud music, and more crowds. Pretty much the standard town festival formula really. Oh, and it ran to midnight and after that we had to tidy everything up. And someone decided it would be a great idea to put the 5’3″ (168cm) Brit on the rota for the stage door bouncer.

Still, there are worse ways to spend a Saturday night than trying to keep people on the public side of the stage door by sheer force of personality and a step. Besides, I got to hang out with some of our clients and hear their stories and as soon as enough time has passed that I can tell them without the people involved being identified you’ll read them here.

Alas you won’t ever get the full experience of the Tale of the Announcers Dentures, to name but one, because that requires the announcer themselves to be recreating the situation and audiences reaction, but I’ll do my best.

In the meantime, I’m going to stop writing before I lose the ability to use sentences and fall aslpffrrrrzzzzzzz….

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